One Dark Line- My journey to motherhood 

 

There are many couples who go through a very tough time while trying to conceive a baby. By god’s grace, our journey to the parenthood land was quite trouble-free and short. Still in those few early months of trying, I would get disappointed by a negative pregnancy home test. That one dark line instead of two would make me feel helpless.

Even though we both were not really desperate for a child and had given us a few years to make our wish come true before ringing the warning bell but at times social pressure, and fear of not being able to become a mother would take me to a sad place.

Whenever I feel that I am in a place of insecurity or fear, I try to express my feelings through words. That is how and where this poem came alive, from a place of helplessness, insecurity, and sadness.

~~~~~

One dark line,

Your sharpness cuts me through,

Your darkness pulls me in,

Into a deep dark insanity,

Where all hope dies.

With your loneliness,

You bring along grief and sorrow,

That I try to fight.
You can’t enslave me,

Your heartlessness,

Your pathetic existence,

Is not stronger than my desire.

I will succeed,

In creating your mirror image,

I will complete you,

Make you come alive,

With a heart that,

Beats so strong,

That your single dead existence,

Will transform into a,

Beautiful timeline.

~~~~

People tell me that I try too hard in life maybe that’s why I changed that one dark line into two beautiful little girls, Maheera and Inaya.

Good luck to everyone who is in this phase of life where your strongest wish is to become a parent. Stay positive and stress free. It will happen for you sooner than you think. Good luck and God bless!

 

Image source: https://www.facebook.com/bigleyphotography

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12 thoughts on “One Dark Line- My journey to motherhood 

  1. I have friend who recently went through this phase ..so I understand how frustrating and tiring it is 🙂 and you have beautifully woven that emotion in words 🙂 But by god’s grace ..she is pregnant now 🙂 And for you congratulations 🙂 and beautiful names 🙂 Happy parenthood 🙂

    Like

        • I did not automatically feel like a mother like they show in the movies. No tears. No instant love. My relationship with both of them is getting better with time. I know each of them well And love keeps growing each day.

          There are days that are super tough and then are those that are super fun. Overall, it is pretty fulfilling. I never thought I could love someone that much. 🙂

          Liked by 1 person

        • Now that was a true answer 🙂 my sis in law last year gave birth to a baby boy …I saw both of them grow with each other 🙂 so yes I understand how days are 🙂 being a mother 🙂 keep enjoying 🙂 god bless the girls 🙂

          Like

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